The truth found in spilled blood

The stars couldn't tell me the truth
Nor the Moon showed me it's face
When I asked them a simple question
'Why?'
Why did she want to go
Did She find a way
To run away from Her past?
In ecstatic destructive way
Cutting Her wrists, writing Her pain?
What crawled in Her mind
When She lost control again?

Standing by the river I am thinking
Should I jump again?
Carve my stone bound heart
And drown by the weight of it?
Or maybe I should
Turn it into ivory comb
And brush out your hair?

There are days like this
When I can not write words
The will to live, the will to love
Is fading
Can't paint worlds and emotions
Under this starless sky
When sinister night is covering
My frightened mind and soul
While sitting hour by hour
Trying to be strong for You

There is a voice in my head
Yelling at me to stop
You've got to go, you've got to flee
To save yourself from
Coming eve